Well, I obviously have commitment issues with this blog. I have once again failed at setting a posting schedule for myself. Summer has just been incredibly busy. I have been doing distance courses, visiting with family, catching up on TV I neglected all winter and planning my next trip. As I set out to do this year (have adventures if your new here) I am going on my next adventure. In ten short days I am going to be road tripping 17 short hours to Chicago to see One Direction. Please do not tell me how as an adult I shouldn't listen to or like One Direction, their music makes me happy and I deserve no judgement for doing something that makes me happy.

So now onto the motivational message of this post. I hope that by me doing something somewhat extraordinary to achieve happiness that it inspires you to take a big chance if the reward is beneficial to your happiness. Shouldn't we all try a little harder to find the promise land of life. Happiness is a choice. You can choose to say no to opportunities, you can choose to stay sedentary in life and never take chances. Or you can say yes, say yes to adventure, say yes to opportunities that might scare you, say yes to you. You are the most important person in your life and you deserve to be just as happy as anybody else.

Happy Monday!!

At War With Myself: #BodyPositivity #Fatshame

Recently, my twitter and Instagram feeds have been blowing up with two different social media movements. There is the #fatshame and the #bodypositivity. I have taken some time to think about these trends carefully and I am now at a war with myself.

I was a little nervous to post my thoughts on these subjects as both hit close to home in many ways.  As most of my close friends and family know, I have been on a journey to improve my health for approximately 2 years, to not much success. People think that to help me is to offer their opinions or tips, but the last thing I need is the opinion of someone who doesn't know what it is like. I know most of the reason why I have not been successful is my own fault and that I am my own worst enemy in this process, but I also know that my life right now does not bode well to making a complete lifestyle change overnight, it costs a lot of time and money, both of which I don’t have a lot of. Now, saying that I am trying to change the way I am is not me saying I hate myself the way I am, or that I will put up with someone else fat shaming me either, but I also don’t feel like we should be praising a person for being this way, because the fact of the matter is they, like me, are morbidly obese.

Instead of the popularity and press the body positive (BoPo as it is known in the social media world) movement is receiving, we should be voicing the problem and try to see the middle ground between both camps. I also would like to stress again that this is not me fat shaming myself or these beautiful people that feel the need to spread themselves all over twitter and Instagram, I am truly worried about the long term effects that these people think staying this way will cause. I am worried for myself to stay like this.

Truth is, to lose the amount of weight that I need to, diet and exercise alone will be a long drawn out process. I am most likely looking at surgical intervention (I have been on a waiting list for 1.5 years already) of which is not easily accessible unless you can pay for it yourself, but I can’t. It is extremely expensive and the only surgery that is covered in Manitoba is highly invasive, irreversible and is a minimum 3 year wait.

I feel that success cannot be a solo achievement in this war and it will not be helped with shame or praise, it will be defeated with truth and change. In order for any change to happen, we must voice the problem, a problem that our governments, society and even we, the ones it affects, are so quick to ignore. I need help. If there is a big health risk to being anorexic or bulimic and they get help through health insurance and your provincial health plan, why can’t they help the other end of the spectrum, both are a disease. If we start helping and fixing the problem now, the positive implications will be aplenty. Health costs will go down because the population will be healthier and not need as many prescriptions and medical treatments, there will be less depression and more happy people.

I ask the question every day, “should I embrace the me I am today, or strive to be something better?” I believe that if we stop trying to better ourselves, how do we reach our goals or grant our wishes? And if we don’t fix this now, if I don’t fix this now, will we (will I) be around to do that?

Hello Again!

I have been gone on sabbatical. I figured out that I had made too many promises to this blog and maybe myself. These promises were somewhat unrealistic with my current life situations. I have now come back, refreshed and with a keen sense of what I want out of this blog and what I want to share on it. Instead of the planned days and harsh schedule that I tried to adhere to, I am going to go free form. I was starting to feel extremely burnt out trying to come up with a new lesson to preach for Motivational Mondays and plan a recipe to try for Tasty Tuesdays, and that was never what this blog was supposed to be.

I made this blog to document my life and to talk about things that I love. It was meant as a reprieve from my office day job. It was supposed to be a creative outlet. So from now on I will promise a minimum of one post per week. That may be more and, quite frankly, if I am busy with life or on holiday, it could be less. I do promise though that if I do miss a week, it will be made up for in the posts that come from needing to miss.

I have missed this, the feel of the keys floating away as I type my thoughts. I miss the comments, though few and far between, I miss looking at my statistics and realizing that people I don't know have read what I have wrote, and on some occasions, come back to read again.

So I suppose I do have a Motivational Monday lesson that can be learnt here. Do something for you, and if it becomes work, stop. We have enough work in our lives that the things we do to escape it should not be hard, but easy.

Motivational Monday #14: Real Men Don't Buy Girls

Recently, 300 Nigerian school girls were kidnapped by the Boko Haram. They have tortured and taken the innocence of many of them and have threatened to attack more schools and take more children. They have been said to have sold the girls that they call "slaves" for as little as $12. This isn't right, just because it isn't in our backyards doesn't mean we can't do anything to help. I ask you today to take to what people my age know best, go to Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. and take a selfie holding a sign with the #bringbackourgirls. Make sure to tag our government officials in it. If we can be heard, maybe we can give a voice back to the girls of Nigeria that have been silenced.

To read more on the story here and to track the progress of our efforts, please visit https://www.facebook.com/bringbackourgirls or track the hashtag on social media.

Tasty Tuesday: I am Such a Copycat

For Easter, I was in charge of dessert. I was told that it had to be enough to feed about 10 people and not cupcakes. Pretty simple instructions so I went to work to find a recipe. Recently, I went to Applebee's and had their Maple Butter Blondie and forgot how delicious it is, so that's what I decided to make. I had so many compliments on it and thought I should share it with you, and it has been a while since the last Tasty Tuesday.

The recipe: (found here)
**I doubled this and it fed about 15-18 servings

Blondie:

• 1 cup sifted flour
• 1/8 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 1 dash salt
• 1/2 cup chopped walnuts
• 1/3 cup salted butter
• 1 cup brown sugar (packed)
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
• 1 egg (beaten)
• 1 egg white (beaten)
• 1/2 cup white chocolate chips or 1/2 cup white chocolate chunks
• 1/3 cup water

Maple Butter Sauce:

• 1/3 cup butter
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup cream cheese
• 1/4 cup maple syrup
• 2 tablespoons brown sugar
• 1/2 cup chopped walnuts (dessert topper)

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 350°F.
2. Sift the flour, then add baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Sift all together into small bowl.
3. Add chopped nuts, mix, then set aside.
4. Add melted butter, brown sugar, beaten eggs, and vanilla in a bigger bowl and mix well.
5. Add flour mixture, slowly while mixing.
6. Stir in white chocolate chips or chunks.
7. Add water and stir so batter is even.
8. Pour into 9x9x2 inch pan.
9. Bake for about 25 minutes till toothpick comes out clean.
10. Let cool then serve with vanilla bean ice cream, maple butter sauce, and sprinkle with chopped walnuts.
11. Maple Butter Sauce:.
12. Melt butter in a saucepan on medium heat.
13. Whisk in sugar, maple syrup, and brown sugar.
14. Add cream cheese a little bit at a time, whisking fast until the sauce is smooth and creamy.
15. Increase flame to medium-high while whisking continuously till sauce bubbles and thickens.
16. Serve warm on top of blondie and ice cream.

The Preparation: 

This was quite easy to prepare. Took about 40 minutes total. I had a hard time getting the cream cheese to incorporate into the sauce, I have had this problem before using no-name brand and I think that's what was wrong. Also, I suggest leaving it in the oven 5 minutes longer, but keep an eye on it.

The batter was kind of runny.

How big the double batch was

The sauce cooking

The Taste Test: 

This was fantastic. Next time I would still add more white chocolate to it. I also would try it with ice cream as I forwent this option.

The Switch Up: 

This was already a switch-up from its older sister the Brownie. I might try it with raspberries instead of walnuts next time and make a cheesecake brownie. mmmm...

Remember, let me know in the comments if you tried this and how it went. Share it on Facebook and twitter to make me your best friend 5ever. 

Happy Tuesday!

Motivational Monday #13: Just Keep Breathing

Your hero wears a cape, that's cute. Mine wears a bass and a camera.

This is Charles Trippy. He is one of my favourite YouTubers and the greatest inspiration in my life. He has been dealt a shitty hand, but everyday he gets up shakes off the day before and keeps filming it for the world to see. Three years ago, while on tour with his band We the Kings, he had his first seizure. It turned out to be a brain tumor, he got it removed and kept going. Months passed and he had another seizure, another tumor and brain cancer. He had surgery and is now on his 7th round of chemo and it has shrunk tremendously. Recently, he and wife, Alli, announced that they are separating. Charles could have gave up, but he didn't. Everyday since the announcement of their breakup he has posted his daily vlog as if nothing has happened. He kept on breathing.
I challenge you to follow in his footsteps. If something bad happens, keep going, keep trying and it will help you get through.